(Dreamer)

"Jangan ragu untuk belajar dari yang terbaik di seluruh dunia" - Anies Baswedan I think my mental block was all over my head that making me kinda scared to go out from this country. Going out from this chamber sounds so impossible and hardly be achieved. There are decent counts of reasons and I'm still thinking that overseas is way to far, even just to gain master degree. I always doubting about my capacity before even try.  I still had no idea if it achievable, and maybe,  maybe, I would actually try to apply to study somewhere somehow in the future. Sounds like another wacana right?!. Well I'll let it be I guess. If the time is right, I believe I might really try. Like now, I somehow approaching to inoculate some mushrooms. Well, I'm still trying to find some simple equipment, and decomposing that accessible potential substrate, and I still had no idea if it really gonna work. Well let's see aja kali ya :3.

Memaknai kata "saya kaya banget, karena punya Allah" yg dibilang ustadz Adi. Ngga memaknai juga si, mungkin lebih ke merenungi kali ya?!, karena iman gua masih jauh sampai kesana. Belakangan kekecewaan datang berkali-kali tanpa permisi, sampai ke titik I'm a little too exhausted. Yaa Allah ini jalan hidup mau dikemanain? Kok yha kirain terjunnya udah sampai tanah, tapi ternyata masih bisa jatuh kebawah lagi.  Gua yakin ujian para asatidz pasti jauh lebih sulit, mungkin lu harus perbanyak ilmu biar tetep bisa optimis?!. Because I'm sure you really know that Allah want the "best for you", and that doesn't mean He gives dunya for you or whatever your desire is. Dan ustadz Ami juga pernah bilang, inget hari ngga selamanya malam dan gelap, dan badai di hidup kita juga pasti ada akhirnya, entah Allah perbaiki kondisi kita, atau mungkin berakhir karena kontrak kita di dunia sudah habis. Tapi walaupun paham ilmunya by logic, if it's not really internalized w...